Stars: ★★★★☆ (Good Read)

Premise

This book is a detailed examination of the story of Samson, his life choices, and his missed potential to lead the Israelites in peace and perhaps win the Philistines to be followers of God. It starts with an overview of the story of Judges 13-16 to provide a general understanding of Samson’s story as a whole. Then it dives deeper into the stories themselves, examining revenge, forgiveness, choices, and relationships along the way. The main point of the book is that Samson missed almost every opportunity to honor his Nazirite vow and bring glory to God instead of himself. The book walks through the fact that we have many of the same choices every day in our lives, using Samson as a cautionary tale of what can happen if we choose to rely on our own strength rather than the power of God.

Loved

1. The Nature of Forgiveness
   I loved the way the author defined forgiveness and explained that emotional wounds, like physical wounds don’t heal when we ignore them. It takes care and attention for complete healing. He discusses the fact that forgiveness is not excusing the actions, forgetting them, or allowing things to go back to the way they were. It is choosing not to hold onto the anger and the pain that came with the actions. Forgiveness is for our own spiritual health, not for the person who sinned against us. Forgiveness liberates us from the bondage of bitterness, anger, and resentment.
   
   I carried unforgiveness in my heart for years. It’s a heavy burden to walk around with each day, and only through the power of the Bible was I able to give that burden to God and walk around freed from the spiritual and emotional chains in which it had wrapped my heart. Samson never found the power of forgiveness. Even his final act, which we often consider one of his greatest victories, was not for the glory of God or for the liberation of the Israelites from Philistine oppression. It was for revenge for the Philistines gouging out his eyes. He led the Israelites for 20 years, which was a short period compared to the periods of peace brought by other judges, but he never led himself back to the humility that comes with forgiveness and righteousness.

2. Samson Did Right in His Own Eyes
   This was an eye opening chapter for me. It explained not only that Samson did make choices according to what he saw was right but also that he led the Israelites to do the same thing. Samson continually made decisions based on what he wanted to do, which is how he ended up in an upward cycle of revenge that decimated entire towns. At least in the portion of the story recorded in the Bible, Samson did not make any decisions to glorify God. He made decisions out of anger and his own levels of righteousness. Gray points out that before Samson, there is no reference to anyone in Judges doing “what was right in his own eyes,” but after 20 years of Samson’s leadership, the final chapters of Judges are some of the most gruesome in the Bible. Our sin often has consequences far beyond ourselves.
   
   This is directly relevant to our culture today. There are so many references to the ideas that you should “speak your truth” or “follow your heart” or “do what’s best for you,” as though there is no factual truth. I strongly believe that people should have the space to speak their experiences and to provide their point of view, but my point of view does not equal the truth. In fact, it’s often far from the truth because I’m missing so much context. That doesn’t mean I should be silenced, but it does mean I should open to finding the facts. Samson was not interested in God’s Truth, in The Truth; he was only interested in his own emotions and fulfilling his desires in the moment. As disciples, we have to widen the aperture and be willing to see beyond our own eyes.

3. Ezer Kenegdo
   As a Christian wife, the phrase “suitable helper” can become pervasive, but the author provides an enlightening description of it. This is a notoriously difficult phrase to translate into English, which is why there are a variety of word choices and explanations behind it. Here, the author explains that ezer means helper and strength. When this word is used in other places in the Bible, it is a reference to the help and strength that God offers men in times of need. It is a powerful description, connoting a role that provides strength and help in hard times. Kenegdo can be translated multiple ways, and Gray says that it indicates the idea of confronting face to face, challenging the other person. His theory is that God intended our partners in marriage to not only help and strengthen us but also challenge us when we are making unrighteous choices.
   
   Samson wanted an ezer without a kenegdo. He wanted a wife who (again) looked good in his own eyes and met all his needs but never pushed him to be a more righteous person. He surely would have looked for a Hebrew wife if that was his goal. Samson was so alone in his life that he showed up to his wedding alone. He met his best man the day of his wedding, and the 30 men who attended him were so ungodly that they threatened to murder Samson’s bride and her family over 30 pieces of clothing. Then they did murder Samson’s bride and her family after Samson took his revenge. This chain of events took place because Samson did not allow anyone to disciple him. He did not want to be challenged. He only wanted people around him to meet his sinful desires.

Didn’t Love

The chapter on revenge was hard for me to access. I carried unforgiveness in my heart for years before becoming a disciple, but I did not relate at all to the desire for revenge. I know that this is a very real struggle for some people, so I’m appreciated the many examples and descriptions he provided, but it was challenging for me to relate to.

Lessons Learned

• Samson could have used his miraculous strength to awe the Philistines of God’s power rather than for inordinate violence. Gray has a great description of the way that Samson could have joined athletic competitions that Philistines held because when athletes won those competitions, they gave glory to their personal gods. This could have been an open door for Samson to reach the people.
• As a parent, we can save our children decades of searching by helping them identify their joys and strengths early in life. Gray cites a study that theorizes in the modern Western world, it takes people until about 35 to figure who they are and their purpose in life. This is one reason Afa and I chose our particular style of homeschooling, so that each of our kids can play to their strengths early rather than spending their 20s trying to identify those strengths.
• Pride comes in so many forms. It is such an insidious sin. Gray says “since we are gluttons for security, pride will do anything to maintain or create gaps.” The idea of being a “glutton for security,” doing whatever we need to in order to maintain our relative position to someone else or to not lose the things we consider valuable and secure, was a new perspective on the way pride can play out in my life.