My kids love hot tea, an affinity which they undoubtedly get from their dad. I grew up in the South where tea always has ice and sometimes more sugar than actual tea, but I didn’t drink it in childhood either. I lived in England for a year and didn’t drink tea there. I’m not a fan of plain black tea, although I have learned to drink some other flavors in the last few years. If I’m going to drink hot tea, I like it the same way I like my coffee – with enough milk and sugar to mask the taste of the main ingredient. So embracing this newfound love of my children has been a process. 

The hardest thing about it has been learning to slow down long enough to make the tea. A cup of milk or water requires about 15 seconds of my time, but making the tea feels like an investment of time. Afa bought a kettle that sits on top of the stove rather than an electric one, and the length of time it took water to boil on the stovetop annoyed me. After boiling the water, I had to set the tea to steep, add the fixings my kids like, and then wait for the tea to cool to a temperature they could handle. The whole process from request to drinking tea took about 15 minutes. In the middle of the day when I’m also working there are times that a 15 minute distraction can feel like a burden. 

Or at least, that is the way it felt at first. In my quintessential Americanism, I want everything to be cheap, quick, and easy. Thankfully, I am learning to slow down and meet the needs that take a little longer. When the kids ask for a cup of tea, I tell them that I can make it but it will be a while before it is ready. They are almost always willing to wait because hot tea is a source of joy for them. I have also been teaching Ana Lia how to make the tea so that she is able to help with this small task as well. 

In addition to the preparation, drinking tea is also a slow activity. Gulping it is a quick way to scald one’s throat. So I have embraced the attraction of serving tea at social gatherings. It brings everyone to the table for an extended period of time. The tea steeps and cools as people enjoy their drinks and talk through their days. It’s a time of community, and those connections reveal themselves in the slower process of making and serving the tea. I have discovered many places in which tea has offered me additional opportunities to connect with both my friends and my children.

While we studied Tchaikovsky as our composer during a homeschool term, we watched multiple versions and scenes from Swan Lake. One day when Afa was out of the house for the evening, we decided that we would watch the whole ballet on YouTube. The biggest draw of the evening: hot tea and popcorn. The kids helped me make the popcorn, and I put tea in all our sealable cups so that they could keep their drinks with them on the couch. We all cuddled up on our couch and watched the first two acts. (I discovered that the kids were willing to watch the ballet for as long as the popcorn lasted.) The tea was the finishing flair on our night together. It was a treat as well as a staple. We repeated it all two weeks later with The Nutcracker, and we are all gaining a greater appreciation for both the ballet and the tea.

I have also fully embraced poetry teatimes, and the tea is again the magnet pulling the kids toward our kitchen table. It helps me because I don’t do poetry or tea, so poetry teatime is not the first activity I want to add to the list. However, we are all benefiting from the chance to spend time reading poems that are funny, rhyming, modern, and classical. We listen to the same poem from Poetry Speaks to Children and Hip Hop Speaks to Children; then we compare and contrast the sounds. Our cups of tea, in mugs rather than sealed cups, add an air of sophistication to our weekly time of connection. 

Bible studies are another favorite time to incorporate hot tea. The whole process gives everyone a chance to catch up on their days before we get down to the real studying business. It feels inviting and warm for everyone to have their hot drink and sit around the table ready to go. It was not always my go-to, but I have wholeheartedly embraced it.

Despite my natural tendencies to want something much quicker than hot tea, my kids have helped me see the benefits and the joy that can come from a nice cuppa.