A Day in the Life of a Stay at Home Mom with Toddlers and an Infant

‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’  The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.

Mark 12:30-31

Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.

Titus 2:4-5

Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.

Matthew 28:19-20

She sets about her work vigorously;
    her arms are strong for her tasks.
She sees that her trading is profitable,
    and her lamp does not go out at night.

Proverbs 31:17-18

I don’t know how reading the above Scriptures makes you feel, but my visceral response, especially when they are all listed together is: “How can I possibly do all of these things?” Is it possible to have a daily quiet time AND take care of my kids AND keep up my household AND make other disciples AND maybe sleep at some point?? As these thoughts begin to fill my head, I get to a place where I am completely overwhelmed and want to quit it all….hello, Netflix!

I have had the incredible privilege of a five month maternity leave, and for the first time had the opportunity to assume the role of a stay at home mom. I’m going to share with you the schedule that I keep (on most days) that has allowed me to have quality time with my kids, continue making disciples, and maintain my sanity all at the same time. Keep in mind that this is not the “right” way to do it; it is the way that works for us at this point. Please take from it what works for you and leave what does not.

6:00am: Quiet Time

• This is the time I give to God. Of course, there are days where the kids wake up too early or the day has gotten off schedule, so I have to have it in the afternoon. But having my time with God before I spend time with the kids sets everyone up for success.

7am: Wake up and Breakfast

• My kids eat almost immediately when they wake up, so I have yogurt ready as they drift to the table. I also make my breakfast and coffee. The kids know that we are going to do activities together, but only after Mommy has finished coffee. This way everyone is nourished and feeling their best when we start play time.

8:00am – 11:00am: Play time

• This is the time where my children have my full attention. I put my phone away, unless it’s part of our activities for the morning. I don’t respond to texts or emails.
• I usually have one or two activities planned for this period because I operate better in a structured environment. If the kids don’t like the activities for the day, I try to stay flexible (still mastering this skill)
• I also schedule doctor appointments during this time if at all possible. This is when the kids are in the best space emotionally, and the appointments do not interrupt nap times.
• We also do our outside time here, usually either going for a walk, riding bikes in a parking lot (it’s enclosed), or going to the park. I find that everyone is in a better place if we get some time outside everyday.

11:00am-12noon Lunch time

• Lunch is usually leftovers from the night before to make it easy on everyone
• If dinner needs to go in a crock pot, this is when I put it on
• I plan for lunch to take an hour-ish because this provides lots of time for the kids to “help” and for them to eat at their own pace. One of our goals as a family is for meal times to be bonding times not battles, so I have to leave plenty of time for them.

12:30pm-3:00pm – Naps

• We all lay down together and read books until the kids fall asleep. This usually takes 30 minutes for us. Then the kids sleep one and half to two hours.
• If I need a nap, I stay with the children. Understand that this is a GOOD choice if you need it. You cannot help anyone if you are so sleep-deprived you cannot function.
  • During the first few months postpartum, I was up multiple times during the night. So a nap at this point in the day was imperative. I got much less done around the house, and for that time, it had to be okay.
• If I don’t need a nap, this is my productive time. I can work on articles (like this one!), do administrative stuff for the family (health insurance, bills, etc.), finish my quiet time if I need to, or get some things done around the house.
• This is also when I invite people over for studies. I set up studies for 1:30pm and ask people to be on time so that we maximize nap time.

3:00pm-4:00pm – Screen Time

• This is how we choose to limit screen time. The kids know that we “watch” after naps. When they ask at other times of the day, I remind them that we haven’t taken naps so we can’t watch yet.
  • This limit is important for me, mostly. Otherwise, I would be capricious regarding when screens are okay and when they aren’t. That inconsistency with rules is not good for the kids or my relationship with them.
• It also extends the peaceful afternoon time that I can be productive or keeps them entertained if we are doing a Bible study.

4:00pm-6:00pm

• I don’t have a name for this period, but honestly it is the hardest part of my day. The kids seem to be the most agitated at this point, and I’m ready for Afa to be home.
• I also try not to answer my phone during this time, but that can be challenging if there is an event during the evening. However, I have found a direct correlation between the amount of time I am on my phone and the level of chaos in my house.
• I have the kids help pick up the play areas, and I finish getting dinner ready so that we can eat as soon as Afa gets home, especially if we have somewhere else to be in the evening.

6:00pm – Daddy’s Home!!

• THE BEST PART OF THE DAY
• Depending on the evening, we may sit down immediately and eat so we can get out the door.

8:30pm-9:30pm – Screen Time

• This is our second opportunity during the day to “watch.” Letting the kids have screen time at this point gives Afa and I a chance to connect and plan for the next day.

9:30pm – Bed Time

• I take the kids to bed, and we do stories again until the kids fall asleep. Honestly, I usually fall asleep with them.
• Afa does the dishes while I lay down with the kids and then wakes me up when he is done.

This is how our days look for now. My maternity leave is over soon, so I’ll let you know what our days look like when Afa and I are both going to work full time!